C-section farts!

When you stop to think about it, the process of getting a baby out of your body is amazing. There’s the old-fashioned “natural” method which, in terms of physics, is about like Andre the Giant pulling on a turtleneck sweater. That fucking ($0.25) thing will never be the same again.  I missed out on that little miracle of geometry, as all five of my children were surgically removed by C-section.  In either case, read on, because I’m about to make you feel better either about your to’ up from the flo’ up vagine (vah-jeen), or your undeniable need to fart. Maybe both.

Continue reading